Ars Bloggia
OK. So I'm trying really hard not to obsess about who it was that mentioned my blog to Ethan's school administration. Because I need less, not more paranoia in my life.
But it's REALLY! HARD!
There is a scenario in my head whereby my old nemesis Laura has somehow, through means known only to the evil, located my blog and, because her favorite thing in life is to ruin mine and/or embarrass me, decided to anonymously phone the school.
Because that's the kind of thing that runs through my head.
My other paranoid idea is that it was that odious fellow from the beginning of the school year, who defamed me via email.
Because I am a GRUDGE! GIRL! and I DON'T GET OVER IT WHEN PEOPLE ARE MEAN TO ME!
ACK!
Also, because I am the mistress of endless mental tape loops, I have been going over and over again what I actually said to the very nice administrators, and, though I think I sounded totally sane and receptive, I didn't acquit myself intellectually quite the way I would've liked. So I have to do that here, or else it'll never leave my head and I'll never get to sleep. I'll be up at, like, 3:30 watching re-runs of Becker on WGN and rehearsing my un-given speech out loud to myself.
So what I want to say to those who think blogging is weird and, like, unnecessarily and messily self-exposure-y, and possibly pitiful and needy or flagrant and needy, and who just don't understand why I would do it is that:
1) (Here's where I get all Women's Studies on ya!) Throughout history women haven't always had mainstream communication resources available to them, and so, we have made use of our wonderful adaptability and openness to embrace the means of expressing ourselves that we actually have at hand. This has sometimes meant that we were in the forefront of developing communication media, creating paradigms and blazing trails in areas that others might perhaps deem lowly or sketchy or beneath the dignity of those with access to the more widely accepted, traditional communication venues.
I believe blogging qualifies. Though men and women both certainly blog, the internets I have been lurking and then participating in are an amazing place for women to form communities, to support each others' experiences, emotions, aspirations, and interests. Blogging is especially well-suited to women's realities. We can do this from home, while we attend to our children and the million other things that fill our lives. We can fit it in whenever, which is not often, we have a spare moment. We can reach out to each other, listen to each other, encourage each other, and help to heal each other. In a world where we are increasingly insulated from each other, and which often engenders loneliness by its very vastness, we have learned to use this technology to create an online kinship.
Heather (Dooce) and Mrs. Kennedy (Fussy) and Alice (Finslippy) and Melissa (Suburban Bliss) and Maggie (Mighty Girl) and Mimi Smartypants exemplify the heights we can attain, if we embrace this new medium with conviction and, well, love. Just look at that list. These women are pretty much making a living by doing what they love! TV appearances and magazine spreads and conferences and book deals and Amsterdam and Andrew Shue, people!
And I bet everyone who reads this post can name other equally accomplished, brilliant, hilarious women who belong on the list I just created.
Someday, I'm going to be on that list. I'm going to make a living doing what I love. That's why I do this. It's part of a path I've set myself on.
2) Whether or not to post pictures of one's children is a difficult choice. I have chosen to do so, and I am completely aware that not everyone would be comfortable making this same choice. I have chosen to be brutally honest and open about my life, and that openness includes wanting to share those photographic moments that mean something to me. I am aware some people will judge me for this. I am aware that for some people, this would be taking an unacceptable risk with one's children's safety. I do not choose to live in this way because, for me, it would feel like living in a hyperbaric chamber. So, while you may feel free to judge me for my decision, you should also know that it is one I have considered carefully. I am nothing if not thoughtful.
Ahhhh. That's better. Of course, I'll probably obsessively edit this post about 1000 times before I feel I've gotten everything just right, but this is a start.
Are you with me?
p.s. I've gotten requests from several people for an email address. I've established a yahoo mail account, and the address is now available on my profile. Feel free to drop me a line! I did receive your comments, even though they don't appear on the post to which they were attached. Blogger has been having some major issues this weekend!
But it's REALLY! HARD!
There is a scenario in my head whereby my old nemesis Laura has somehow, through means known only to the evil, located my blog and, because her favorite thing in life is to ruin mine and/or embarrass me, decided to anonymously phone the school.
Because that's the kind of thing that runs through my head.
My other paranoid idea is that it was that odious fellow from the beginning of the school year, who defamed me via email.
Because I am a GRUDGE! GIRL! and I DON'T GET OVER IT WHEN PEOPLE ARE MEAN TO ME!
ACK!
Also, because I am the mistress of endless mental tape loops, I have been going over and over again what I actually said to the very nice administrators, and, though I think I sounded totally sane and receptive, I didn't acquit myself intellectually quite the way I would've liked. So I have to do that here, or else it'll never leave my head and I'll never get to sleep. I'll be up at, like, 3:30 watching re-runs of Becker on WGN and rehearsing my un-given speech out loud to myself.
So what I want to say to those who think blogging is weird and, like, unnecessarily and messily self-exposure-y, and possibly pitiful and needy or flagrant and needy, and who just don't understand why I would do it is that:
1) (Here's where I get all Women's Studies on ya!) Throughout history women haven't always had mainstream communication resources available to them, and so, we have made use of our wonderful adaptability and openness to embrace the means of expressing ourselves that we actually have at hand. This has sometimes meant that we were in the forefront of developing communication media, creating paradigms and blazing trails in areas that others might perhaps deem lowly or sketchy or beneath the dignity of those with access to the more widely accepted, traditional communication venues.
I believe blogging qualifies. Though men and women both certainly blog, the internets I have been lurking and then participating in are an amazing place for women to form communities, to support each others' experiences, emotions, aspirations, and interests. Blogging is especially well-suited to women's realities. We can do this from home, while we attend to our children and the million other things that fill our lives. We can fit it in whenever, which is not often, we have a spare moment. We can reach out to each other, listen to each other, encourage each other, and help to heal each other. In a world where we are increasingly insulated from each other, and which often engenders loneliness by its very vastness, we have learned to use this technology to create an online kinship.
Heather (Dooce) and Mrs. Kennedy (Fussy) and Alice (Finslippy) and Melissa (Suburban Bliss) and Maggie (Mighty Girl) and Mimi Smartypants exemplify the heights we can attain, if we embrace this new medium with conviction and, well, love. Just look at that list. These women are pretty much making a living by doing what they love! TV appearances and magazine spreads and conferences and book deals and Amsterdam and Andrew Shue, people!
And I bet everyone who reads this post can name other equally accomplished, brilliant, hilarious women who belong on the list I just created.
Someday, I'm going to be on that list. I'm going to make a living doing what I love. That's why I do this. It's part of a path I've set myself on.
2) Whether or not to post pictures of one's children is a difficult choice. I have chosen to do so, and I am completely aware that not everyone would be comfortable making this same choice. I have chosen to be brutally honest and open about my life, and that openness includes wanting to share those photographic moments that mean something to me. I am aware some people will judge me for this. I am aware that for some people, this would be taking an unacceptable risk with one's children's safety. I do not choose to live in this way because, for me, it would feel like living in a hyperbaric chamber. So, while you may feel free to judge me for my decision, you should also know that it is one I have considered carefully. I am nothing if not thoughtful.
Ahhhh. That's better. Of course, I'll probably obsessively edit this post about 1000 times before I feel I've gotten everything just right, but this is a start.
Are you with me?
p.s. I've gotten requests from several people for an email address. I've established a yahoo mail account, and the address is now available on my profile. Feel free to drop me a line! I did receive your comments, even though they don't appear on the post to which they were attached. Blogger has been having some major issues this weekend!
posted by grudge girl at 5:25 PM
4 Comments:
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
sorry GG, i took down my last comment because i didn't want to cause any problems ... i hadn't yet read the post about ethan's school and the administration. i don't want to make it seem like i'm instigating some negative feeling towards the school.
just so everyone knows, there is no one who is more dedicated to her children than GG. she only wants the best for them, and naturally, she wants to protect them. i hope people can understand and honor that feeling. i've never even met GG or spoken to her, but i know that is true just be reading her blog.
You go girl! Excellent post!!! I wsas sitting at my computer hollering "Hell yes!" but sadly no one could hear me because the superbowl is on in the TV room and you couldn't hear an atomic bomb drop over that game.
I found out something interesting today. Seems that my son's friend works at Beef and Boards too. He does something with tech stuff like lighting and his name is Andy. Didn't know if you knew him or not. Small world and all that. Although after your recent experience with nameless people who are too chicken to comment and let you know they know you in person, well I don't blame you for wanting it to NOT be a small world.
I can't imagine you being anything less than thoughtful and dedicated to your family. And I agree completely, although it was a little woman's studies-ish. :-)
And I think that sometimes people are jealous of the friendships and community that we have formed here. But just because they are online doesn't make them any less genuine. Or valuable.
Just keep on keeping on, my friend. You may doubt yourself, but you are an excellent mother, wife, friend.
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